An issue of trust

I know I can trust them. But up to what extent? They don't really get anything from me anymore. I have no use to them. They get a lot out of the new friends they now have. I just realized now if I can really trust them like I used to do. I freely give my trust to everyone. I always assume that everyone's good and that they won't even think of anything bad about me. But is that still absolute?

I wonder if I should avoid them now. I've done this in the past and have managed to stay afloat. I can do it again.

But I will miss them. Every friend I make is like a family member to me already.

Me, my friends and Starbucks

I miss my friend Shen. Whenever I see Starbucks, our fave coffee shop where we spent countless conversations over designer coffee, I remember her.

She is in Chicago now. It might take her a while before she can come back for a visit. She's like a sister to me and our two other friends Tim and Jing. We are actually sisters, kindred souls.

I just miss my friend. I know she's doing well in her new home and I am very happy for her! Soon, she'll come home for a visit and there will be lots and lots of things to talk about for sure.

;)

Too generous for my own good :(

There are days when I hate myself for being too generous. I would think of others and even though I am not waiting for anything in return, a simple concern for me would have been nice. You know, I look out for you, you look out for me. I am not asking others to do this but again it would have been nice to know they appreciate what I do for them.

But that is not the case. I find myself being the only one concerned. What's a tip that there's something I could look into, right? Only for themselves!

Nakakasama lang ng loob talaga.

He makes me smile ☺

I swear he does!

♥♥♥

Today...

I am worried about my health.

But I am trying to take it off my mind. I hate doctors and medical check-ups and hospitals. Three deaths in the family (my brother, my mom and my grandma) gave me a fear of anything medical-related. Even the smell of clinics and hospitals make my insides quiver with dread.

So, worries, go away!

Happy birthday Mommy!

Today should have been my mom's 54th birthday. Sadly, she left us more than 5 years ago due to an incurable kidney ailment. She fought a brave battle for 3 years before succumbing due to a multiple organ failure.

I still miss her. We still miss her so much.

Nakakahinayang because my dad, my siblings and I have been enjoying our lives for the past four years and she could have been a part of it all. But God has His plans for each one of us and I am in no position to question it. Plus, I am happy over the fact that she's no longer in pain.

Happy birthday Mommy! You will always be my number 1 ally and inspiration!

:)